For much of my life, I’ve been utterly confused. I’ve considered quite possibly every career other than science or medicine: Journalism, i-banking, consulting, public relations, marketing, environmental science, computer science, law, entrepreneurship, nonprofits, and probably more that I’m missing.
But this year, I think I’ve finally settled on something – something that’s been lurking for a while beneath the surface, something that’s just been sitting under my nose, and now seems bafflingly obvious from the start. I’ve always been interested in law, but now I’ve become fascinated by international law, human rights, and social entrepreneurship. I see no reason why law can’t be innovative and why we cant employ exciting new methods and practices to combat problems that have been around for years – torture, domestic violence, human rights violations, genocide. But if I didn’t get to somehow do something innovative in my career, I would, bottom line, be happy to be working in law.
Finally, after so many years of being a confused liberal arts major, after years of futile exploring – I think I’ve stumbled upon something that really inspires me, urges me to jump in and get involved. That feeling as if a fire has been lit beneath you – as if you can’t rest until something has been done – that feeling, vaguely uncertain yet frighteningly pressing – it must be passion. I feel unabashedly idealistic in saying that I’m passionate about these principles we’ve learned about so fervently in our political science classes – justice, equality, freedom. The pursuit of this can take up lifetimes, but it’s something I think is worth fighting for – maybe the only thing ever worth fighting for.
I don’t think I’ve been this passionate about any “career path” before. But now that I’ve uncovered this gem, how can I actually make it happen? To be honest, I’m worried. I’d like to believe that if you do what you love, everything else will follow…but somehow I can’t help but doubt. I’m afraid of thinking differently and from diverging from the set path. When all my fellow economics majors are joining investment banks and consulting firms, when my pre-professional friends are preparing to immediately enter medical or law school upon graduation – it’s easy to feel left behind in the stampede. Am I doing the right thing in following my interests? Or should I succumb to the pressures and follow along with societal convention, doing something a bit more traditional?
Doubts inevitably creep in: can you actually make a ‘career’ out of working in nonprofits or government agencies, and will I ever get paid what I actually want? I may be a part of Gen Y, and I may think I can accomplish everything I love– but at the same time, I crave stability and comfort. I’m not sure if I can be a starving artist, even if I’m doing what I love. I’m a student now and don’t need to be rich – but eventually I’m going to have a family and may not be able to afford working for a nonprofit. And if I go to law school, which I really really want to do, how will I ever pay back those loans unless I work in corporate law for a while?
You know, where does the balance lie between following your passions and doing something practical? How do I draw the line between going for it and simply doing what I love, versus trying to utilize my skills in a safer, better paying private sector job? I know Penelope Trunk says you shouldn’t try to do what you love, but do what you are. But the truth is, when it comes down to applying for jobs – there’s certain ones that I get incredibly excited about, and certain ones that I simply can’t be inspired by. I don’t want to go to work every day feeling that uninspired. People say you can follow your passions on the side, but really that’s incredibly difficult – who do you know who really spends time writing novels on the side, or running a charity, or developing websites? Very few. I just see middle aged men and women burnt out from their work, and especially from doing something they really don’t love. I’d like to avoid turning into that, myself. And now that I’ve actually found something I’m passionate about, settling for anything less seems like cheating myself; lying about the very essence of who I am.
When I stumble upon these quandaries, I sometimes just read about students like myself and I fall in love with human rights law all over again. And I try to tell myself – if they can do what they love, there’s really no reason why I can’t.
But sometimes even inspiration just isn’t enough to sweep away all the doubts, and I’m left confused, tossing and turning in my sleep and wishing for the right answer.
What do you think? Do what you love, or just try to make a living and make money? Leave a comment & let me know!
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